I don’t feel like december…
Or winter for that matter. Usually winter is my favorite season, this year however I dread the colder days and as far as I’m concerned they can skip the holiday season and be done with it. I have no idea why though, maybe it’s because we haven’t had any real summer or maybe I just need more light to stay cheerful these days, but fact remains winter can just bugger off. Here’s the top 10 things to hate about winter.
10 Less daylight hours, there comes a time during winter that when heading to work and heading home after work there is no actual sunlight, making work seem like all you do.
09 Snow, sure snow angels and snowball fights are awesome. But when I say snow, most see the virgin white blanket covering our world in serene quiet, while in reality the frozen spikes of blackened blubber pierce your bike tires or make you fall on your arse both often and hard.
08 Seasonal cheer, now I really don’t want to “bah humbug” you but… bah Humbug! As long as you enjoy the glittery, booze and food filled celebration of gluttony, go right ahead, but please make it possible for me to avoid it. Oh and guys what are you celebrating, Christ was born in summer, at leas make sure you understand you’re celebrating the pagan feast of the return of light and lengthening of days… which brings me to…
07 Part time Christians, now most know Christianity is not my favored flavor of religion, but go ahead be that way if you want to… but around Christmas there is a large crowd of part time Christians starting to promote “their” religion, one they couldn’t care less about during the rest of the year.
06 The sick, the poor and the homeless, well not them persé but how people all of a sudden seem to grow a conscience and start giving them money after which they merrily forget about them and support the political ideas that put screwed them in the first place.
05 Cars, well their drivers really. When it’s poring rain, freezing or the wind seems to be nearing dangerous velocities and I am out there on my trusty and rusty old bike not a single driver let’s me pass if they don’t absolutely have to. Warm and cozy, Christmas carols on the stereo they smile at me as they race by so they can get home those three seconds sooner.
04 January, it’s like the whole world has hit the reset button and a somber and empty ambiance clouds the world as if seasonal cheers and warm winter nights by the fire are not allowed to continue beyond the last day of November and a worldwide hangover is suffered, the whole month is only surpassed in sadness and uselessness by…
03 February, which has almost nothing going for it, only bright side on this armpit of the year, it’s only 28 days.
02 Winter clothes, both on myself and on others. Having to choose between sweating like crazy or freezing my but off when adjusting my clothes to the weather is a rare challenge in itself. Seeing the rest of the world completely covered in puffy stuffed nylon jackets, parkas and all kinds of body covering, silhouette obscuring winter wear, sort of depresses me.
01 The bloody cold, I used to love the cold, it always seemed to sharpen me…. these days it’s just so bloody uncomfortable.
So fuck winter!