12 October 2011

Life sucks so I brought you a poem and told you about the real me

Good morning........ 

Okay, now I was kinda hoping to do a post on the Auryn Halloween party, but gosh-darnit, I forgot to upload my pictures because of some serious crap taking up all my brain power, serious hit like for instance a dentist appointment and a disagreement with our housing association (hope google translate is accurate here). Hell we barely had time to celebrate the fact that Jasmine and me have been together for 8 years (love you babe).

Since the auryn thing will have to wait, and I don’t really have that much to write about I will leave you with two things, I will do an interview/ survey thingy with myself so you can all get to know me better. First however I want to give you this.

Right now I know a lot of people who are in tough spots, are having very hard times or are being kept awake by serious worrying. Battling your way through life, sacrificing so much of yourself for others will drain you of all you’ve got. Now I know a thing or two about being in bad places and I also know that, even the most terrifying times, the toughest trials and the loneliest places are things that pass. A clich√© as it may be, there is a silver lining. The scariest thing is also the greatest comfort, nothing lasts forever.

From my emo period, seemed to fit the poem
Never would I want this, never,
I don’t want to “come out stronger”
I have been fighting, ‘t seems forever
As each new day seems longer
And every thing seem wrong here
I cannot take this ever

The silver lining, I don’t see
Relief seems far away to me
I’ve swallowed bitter pills for years
But now I long to be, just free

But I will find the way
With help or on my own
I see there will be “that day”
When seeds I’ve sown
In me have grown
To a strength that I know will stay

Today may be the blackest
So tomorrow will be brighter
And though there’s a storm at the horizon
It’s still a little lighter

So here’s me….

I find your lack of education disturbing
Sidney Tuttel van Dorst a.k.a. Nocturnal Lure
Born: 9th of august 1975 (yes way back)
Food: Lasagne, Pizza, Kapsalon
Book: Lord of the Rings, Clive Barker’s Imagica, Rhyme of the Ancient mariner (ST Colleridge) counts as a book right?
Movie: StarWars all episodes (yes, so?), Hellboy, Near Dark
Color: Black, Red, Purple (yes completely Goth)
Bands: In Extremo, Opeth, Skyclad
Heroes in fiction: Darth Vader, Boromir, the Joker and Peter Griffin
Things I like:
Tarot, spirituality, mysticism, music, fantasy, tattoos, Art, reading and enjoying a good meal.
Things I am obsessed with:
Gaming (mainly xbox), Whisky and Sex.
Things I dislike:
Gossip (especially the hurtful kind), cliques, obsessive love of gadgets
Things I hate:
Michael Parkes
Ignorance… I don’ t mind you having other ideas than me and I don’t mind you being stupid but for god’s sake at least within your own potential think before you act/ speak, uninformed opinions and prejudice, authority or lack of personal choice.

Art you should check out:
Michael Parkes, Simon Bisley, Anson Maddocks
Best Tarot decks:
Shadowscapes, Rider Waite (boring but true) and Robin Wood (which I sadly don’t have anymore)
Favorite quote:
May the best of your past, be the worst of your future….


  1. Why don't you have your Robin Wood any more? You can still get it retail?
    And how did you find me? I found you because you posted on my site: Thanks for those 2 cents, a few things to be aware of (and guard against) since it's been some time I did any channelling and path-working like this :)

  2. I managed to meet my Spirit Guide tonight. Thank you for your 2 cents!! :)

  3. @ Louise:
    I lost my Robin Wood when I involuntarily had to move, or more specifically was moved. I have somehow never gotten round to ordering it anew, strangely few shops have the deck on stock over here. They have either the standard US game system decks and/or only Lo Scarabeo decks.

    How I found you, I believe you started following me on twitter if I’m not mistaken.

    You’re welcome for the 2 cents, sharing insight is one of the best uses of the internet right?